To Begin Again

A Leftover Holiday Kiss

Cauliflower Pizza - Success

Rosy Glow

Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. 

                                                          Thomas Jefferson 

The First Day of the Rest of My Life

To Reflect

Happy New Year

January 1

A Collection of Santa Claus's in Glorious Rotundity

We said goodbye to the last three minutes of 2012, lingering at our door with the last two of our guests.  Aloha; hello and goodbye.  It had been a nice evening, we enjoyed a hilarious game of Farkle, wrapped up a busy day of cooking, cleaning, decorating, and it was a little hard to settle down when it was over.  A good year.

Waking up to a new number at the end of the date inspired great thoughts, things to do better, a twitch of excitement somewhere in the vicinity of my solar plexus, and I sat basking in hopeful anticipation with a brand new daily planner.  January 1, 2013. Yet in some ways, I reminded myself, it's just another day that followed the day before.  The power to change is the same as it was on the last day of the year and every other day before that, with the very helpful addition of a tide of rising energy from kindred spirits. 

 I want something a little more out of myself, some progress in the effort department, a little less fear, that indispensable spark that makes the difference, the crucial five second response.  The difference between what I do and what I don't do has been said to be in these moments:  to procrastinate, or not to procrastinate.  I've been doing some serious thinking about the declarations we sometimes hear, particularly the one which states, "I create my life", because I think there is some element of truth in it.  All the while, I realize that I have the same "me" to work with, that nothing has changed except the calendar: not my circumstances, not my way of thinking.  The very same struggles are going to be faced that throughout my efforts to change, have stopped me before.  Change is not easy.  In fact, change is hard.  At least, that is my perception of change, although that perception may need some work.  

  My grandmother helped me understand that starting with the absolute truth is the biggest factor for me to learn, and to make changes.   Having raised six children of her own, she was one smart lady by the time I came along, and seemed to be able to see right through the mildly exotic stories I concocted.  I learned the story of Pinocchio, the fanciful tale of a hand-carved wooden puppet that realized his dream to become a real boy by learning not to stretch the truth.  Grandma had a way of saying things that provoked thoughtful, heart-searching moments as I walked the quarter mile back home, occasionally accompanied by my little sister with whom I had been unable to compromise.  The result of our shameful and temporary banishment to our own house was a mother who had been enjoying the peace and quiet of our absence and would not necessarily be overjoyed to see us arrive, and in disgrace besides.

Grandma's 70 some years of experience examined my honesty and found it wanting, but I learned more than that from listening to her.  Through her pain, I learned something of the history of heartache; that friends sometimes brought disappointment, lessons that were not easily forgotten, that selfishness or laziness caused problems; that friendships could be damaged when someone didn't keep their word or didn't think it was important do their part in some way when they could have, when someone leaned too hard on their friends, when they expected more from others than they were willing to give.  I heard the disappointment in her voice, the warning to not be the friend that left someone wiser but wounded and sad.  

After making some goals of my own a few days ago, I shared them with my own group of supportive confidants, and they shared theirs with me.  Some of the goals have really touched me, partly because of the heartfelt sincerity, the confidential sharing that shows their trust, but also because some of their resolutions were't on my list and should have been.  That gave me pause.  How about digging a little deeper, was the message. And I was reminded that I have some treasures in life that some people close to me would love to have.  I'm especially inspired, in no particular order, to :

1.   Rather than expect my friends to handle life's challenges well, 

to be sensitive to ways that I can show that I truly care.

2. Work harder on getting my taxes done in a timely manner for 2012.

3. Be both supportive and also non-judgmental of the goals of my friends.

4. To be more thankful for my life, even the parts of it that have caused me to be most challenged.

5. To get done that which I intend to do.

Split Pea Soup with Ham

1 pound dried split peas
1 ham hock
3 T butter
1 chopped yellow onion
1 cup chopped celery
1/2 cup chopped carrots
2 t. minced garlic
1 pound chopped ham
1 teaspoon salt
3/4 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 t. crushed red pepper flakes
8 cups water
1 bay leaf
2 teaspoons fresh thyme, or 3/4 teaspoon dried thyme

Place the peas in a large pot or bowl and cover with water by 2 inches, soak overnight.  Drain peas and set aside.  Score the ham hock, place in a pot and cover with water.  Bring to a boil.  Reduce heat and simmer 1 hour.  Drain and set aside.

In a large pot, melt the butter over medium high heat.  Add the onions and cook, stirring for 2 minutes.  Add the celery and carrots, and cook, stirring, until just soft, about three minutes.  Add the garlic and cook, stirring for about 30 seconds.

Add the ham hock and ham, stirring until beginning to brown.  Add the drained peas, salt, pepper, and pepper flakes.  Cook, stirring for about 2 minutes.  Add 8 cups of water, bay leaf and thyme, and cook until the peas are tender about 1 hour.    Add more water as needed if the soup becomes too thick or dry.

Remove the bay leaf and discard.  Adjust the seasonings to taste and serve.  I made a cheese ball that I served on New Year's Eve.  We had some left over, so I shaped it into individual balls and served it with slices of fresh red pepper and fresh spinach and basil leaves.  Be creative with whatever fresh vegetables you have on hand.  Cheese balls, I learned this year, do not have to be served with crackers.

Cheese Ball:

Two packages cream cheese
One small bag of herb seasoning mix, I have some http://www.demarleusa.com/ mixed herbs on hand, but I think it would be easy enough to put together something from the spice cabinet.
Walnuts

Allow cream cheese to soften and mix with herbs, shape more or less into a ball and chill three hours.
If you have a melon ball scoop, it's a good time to use it for individual serving sized balls.  Roll balls in chopped nuts and serve.

A Silver Spoon

Water with Lemon, Please